i got really fucking shit faced…sauced is the word. just so you all know…
Monthly Archive for November, 2002
p.s. i drank 3/4-ish of a liter of rum.. it was good. that’s all… wait. maybe it was half. i dont’ know. i shared it with my brother. and then ther was some other crazy liquor thta i had.. don’t remember what it was called. 70% alcohol though.
have ben drinking…. good thing my parents only live like three streets away. anyhow. hope everyone had a good holiday. mine was crazy (as always) but not too bad. i know that sometimes holidays with the family can be a bit crazy. i work tomorrow… a four hour shift. anyhow. gonna go dsit on my porch. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!! (and stuff)
so…yeah. when everyone wakes up and checks their LJ’s… have a good holiday doing whatever it is that you plan to do with the family or friends etc.
enjoy this glorious day of…. hehe.. no work.
at the end of English class today, my teacher asked me to stick around for a minute. she mentioned to me that her ‘office-mate’ had a crate of books (books that i had been looking at many of in the office last time i talked with my teacher) that he was trying to get rid of. i asked if he was selling them and she mentioned that he was in fact just giving them away. i followed her to the office and took a look at the crate, asking my teacher as i did so, whether or not he had plans to ‘proliferate’ them to other people. her response was, “he asked me to get rid of them as fast as possible… he’s going to be moving to St. Pete to teach at the campus down there.” my next comment was, “does he want the crate? cuz i’ll take them all if i can find a way to carry them.” so now, i have another 60 books to add to my collection. there is a lot of great stuff in there. i’ve found Shakespeare, a ton of classic novels and essays, SHITLOADS of poetry… basically just sixty books of the sort that you would ‘expect’ to find in an English teachers office. but it’s great. Lord knows when i’ll get a chance to read it all. i seem to be gathering books faster than i can read them but for the most part, i’m holding up fine. i’ve read three or four in the last two weeks (which is good considering how busy i’ve been). i need to build a book shelf though. i just wish i had the money. i’ve already got a design for one in my head and it would look great in the living room. maybe i’ll hit up the parents for some money.
so yeah. more books 
it’s 11am and i’m not really sure what to do with the rest of the day. i’m going to ask my mother if she’d like me to ‘take care of Grandma’ for the day or something. i know she plans on doing a lot of cooking for Thanksgiving tomorrow and i also know that having my grandmother around for that is going to drive her insane… so maybe i’ll take her shopping or something.
i’m at a loss for what to do though… truly. i’ve done all the housework that’s possible.
building on someones words… (italicized text)
touching is the same as talking.
converse. reverse. touch me again.
sing to me. dance with me. hold me.
ensnared. within the black hole of your eye.
finger twine. seductive spine.
my everpresent valentine.
i need a cigarette…
a few things…
today i mowed the backyard, smashed apart and threw away an old dresser that was sitting out back, picked up sticks from the front yard, cleaned the living room, moved some stuff to the storage locker to give it more space and worked a little on tidying up my bedroom.
next task… the bathroom… woohoo. (need i restate how bored i am?)
i’ve said it before.. but he says it better…
“We do not remember days… We remember moments.” -Cesare Pavese
(they may or may not make sense…they’re random damnit)
 
 
not often…
soften.
not even so much as.
a nail in my.
coffin…
bipolar what? who?
we often experience bumps in life… when we do, it’s merely a question of how we deal with the situation.
i’m often not too sure i can deal. i guess though… maybe i’ll pull through.
what to do. how to feel. teach me. teach me. show me the way. explain this to me. this game. of life. i can’t do it without you… i can’t. i can’t. no matter how hard i try. you tell me that you don’t need me to justify your life. i wish i could say the same. but i can’t…
concentrate. supplicate. reciprocate.
recluse. seduce. see me for wat i am. not for what you want me to be… but let me know what you see. i’m blind.
impossible to tell really.
impossible to know.
how you’re feeling.
what you’re thinking.
…guess i could ask.
not sure i’d want to know..
there was a moment…
when i thought maybe. just maybe.
you had actually noticed me.
apparently.
i was wrong.
sucks for me…
no wait.
sucks for you…
if it were where i was you.
and you were me.
you’d see.
well… i guess really, i’d see. or..
well… you know what i mean.
right?
(yes, i did a lot of random writing in my ‘journal/sketchbook’ today…)
i want to be remembered for the things that i did right… not for the things that i did wrong.
[a thought]
