grr.. just looked at the Department of Education Affairs website for information on my G.I. Bill benefits… there seems to be a ’slight’ discrepency between what the ‘bug guy’ told me ($1,100 a month) and what the website is saying ($800 a month). i paid EXTRA to get my benefits up to the $800 per month level.. so if they’ve now gone up ‘automatically’ to that much for EVERYONE, what happens to the $$$ that i put in there before i got out of the Air Force?! i wrote them an e-mail. hope they return with some explanation in ‘English’ and not ‘military mumbo-jumbo.’
if i’m not making the $1,100 a month, like i had my hopes up for.. i’m still going to have to put in quite a few hours at Borders, which is going to SUCK!
oh well, it’s Easter.
hooray for bunnies… and stuff…
alright folks.. this is it.. the FIRST ‘piece’ of my new website. it’s not actually DONE. this is sort of ‘just a test’. i know NOTHING of Flash Animation, so this was all learned… today. i’m just looking for ‘overall critique’. you like it.. or dont’ like it?! this is going to be the ‘introduction’ to my website.
a final note: you’re going to have to ‘resize’ your browser window. ie. make it SMALLER, for it to look good. i’m not sure why but it’s sizing itself… grr.. so make it small when you watch it. like i said, i’m still learning.. baby steps :p
http://www.liquid2k.com/peripatetic23/siteintro.swf
tomorrow is Easter. I figured I’d give Erica a call.. she wasn’t there of course (and I figured as much before I called) but I guess I still wanted to ‘try.’ I called her parents house afterwards.. hoping that maybe she’d be there either tonight or tomorrow seeing as how it is Easter. nope. her mom said she has to work.. so I asked if her mother could relay a message to Erica that I’ve been trying to get a hold of her. we’ll see what happens.
things are slowly drifting apart. tectonic plates are separating. I remember something that Erica said to me once, about how… when you find someone in life, not only do you have to be able to ‘work towards’ your own goals WITH the person, but you have to be at a ’similar’ place in both your lives as well. I don’t think I’ve EVER been in the same place with my life, as she is in hers… I’ve ALWAYS been in ‘awe’ of her. she is wonderful, and amazing.
I’m in love with her, and I always will be. she is ‘a part’ of me.. she is a part of my childhood. they say that your first kiss will stick with you forever, and it does.. but I think the first person you ever had a ‘crush’ on is more powerful a memory.. and then.. your first kiss WITH the first person you ever had a crush on is even greater. and then.. the first time you heard your first crush say “I love you” will kill most people. I think I nearly died.
I’m not complaining.. .life is still good. but it ‘hurts’ sometimes. though, none of these memories are things to cry tears of sadness over. just feeling… ‘nostalgic’ I guess
[and then he got really bored...] *thunk* <– that’s the noise your head makes when it hits your desk.. though i guess it would depend on the head.. and what your desk was made out of.
“It is a secret which every intellectual man quickly learns, that, beyond the energy of his possessed and conscious intellect, he is capable of a new energy (as of an intellect doubled on itself), by abandonment to the nature of things; that, beside his privacy of power as an individual man, there is a great public power, on which he can draw, by unlocking, at all risks, his human doors, and suffering the ethereal tides to roll and circulate through him: then he is caught up into the life of the Universe, his speech is thunder, his thought is law, and his words are universally intelligible as the plants and animals. The poet knows that he speaks adequately, then, only when he speaks somewhat wildly, or, “with the flower of the mind;” not with the intellect, used as an organ, but with the intellect released from all service, and suffered to take its direction from its celestial life; or, as the ancients were wont to express themselves, not with intellect alone, but with the intellect inebriated by nectar. As the traveller who has lost his way, throws his reins on his horse’s neck, and trusts to the instinct of the animal to find his road, so must we do with the divine animal who carries us through this world. For if in any manner we can stimulate this instinct, new passages are opened for us into nature, the mind flows into and through things hardest and highest, and the metamorphosis is possible.”
– Ralph Waldo Emerson… Essays: Second Series, The Poet
i think i’m going to buy a new djembe (hand drum) with some of my tip money.
Lisa Loeb has a new album… and it’s just as good as her others.
ahh ‘the longing for’ has returned.. but i won’t go into that…
on to ‘other things.’
i went up to work today, to install the side-steps on Linda’s Jeep.. aparently, it’s not going to work just yet. i need to get a few more parts. grr. no $50 for me. while i was up there, and it was still daylight, i figured i’d take a quick drive by the old building that i had taken photos of recently… went inside. *teehee. very illegal (per the notice on the door, explaining it as being a Federal offense. doh!) but i went in anyhow. WISH i had taken my camera!! grr.. i’m going to head back up there tomorrow i think. SO many ‘photo opportunities’!! i went up in the tower. i’m not exactly sure what it’s purpose is. there was sort of the ’spiral staircase’ that wound along the inside of the thing… it’d go up one ‘floor’.. and then there was the big landing.. and then another staircase. all wooden. VERY rickety. they are made with 2×4’s or something crazy. when you get to the top of this tower… and look up.. there is still 2 more floors worth of space, but there is a GIANT ‘cylinder’/chamber/drum fixed to the walls… so looking up, you see a giant ‘drum’.. i think it may be a ‘fan’ of some sorts, because there once was piping coming out of it. a/c maybe!? definately need pictures!! so, the sign outside the building claims that it is an old National Guard building. not sure what KIND of National Guard building though. it seems to me, more like a ‘dry cleaners’ or a laundry of sorts.. there were TONS of ‘Dry Clean’ tags that you’d find sewn into things scattered ALL over the floors. and they had a giant Service Elevator which was pretty damn cool too!! someone had thrown TONS and TONS of desks and chairs and shelving etc. DOWN the 3 story service elevator, so at the bottom… it’s all stacked up in the open elevator door.. looks VERY cool. looking DOWN on top of it is damn neat too! so, i think that was my excitement for the day. now i’m going to get to work on my cleaning my bedroom.
i wonder… should i give Shannon a call?! hrmmn.
my body screams to climb back into bed… to ignore the bills that i can’t afford to pay. to ignore my messy room, that i can’t seem to ever clean… my window is open, my fan is on.. there is a nice breeze coming in from outside. my bed would be a fine place for a ’small nap.’ the cat in the neighbor’s yard is doing it.. why can’t i?!
i’m selling the side-steps to my Jeep to a girl that i work with. she was just hired recently, and come to find out.. .she owns a wrangler too. we got to talking and she is in need of some side-steps and lo-and behold.. i have some that i haven’t had on my Jeep for MONTHS.. probably almost a year, if not more. so i’m going to sell them to her for $50 and stick em on. i think i’m going to head up there to work soon, so i can do that.
DOH! i just realized.. i don’t have ANY gas in my Jeep… AND, i’ve got no money to BUY gas! grr. what to do, what to do.?!
